The Hughes Cut

I can see one of your hands, but where's your other hand? In between two pillows? Is that what we're talking about? Those aren't pillows!

No, that is comedy. That is like the height of comedy. I can't believe I've watched this twice in the past year. You watched a lot more of this movie than most people will ever watch. Because you watched the John Hughes cut of Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. You saw the lost cut that we talked about last time. We specifically tried to invite Chris Columbus on just to ask him about the Hughes cut that only Chris Columbus had seen until now. And for no other reason, we didn't want to ask Chris about any of the movies he's made. No, no, no. We wanted to ask him about someone else's movie that he was forced to sit through while John Hughes was, like, taking his socks off and fanning them in front of his face.

I mean, presumably, like, what else? What else are we even doing? In case you haven't caught on yet, we're talking about the unsung Thanksgiving masterpiece. The comedy Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. Which someone might have released as a Christmas episode last year. Some people do some silly things sometimes. No, it is the definitive Thanksgiving comedy. Some people might even say the definitive road comedy. Torvald, didn't we already cover planes, trains, and automobiles? Yeah, well, we're covering it again. We'll do it again. We don't care. We'll do whatever we want. It's Thanksgiving. What else are we going to cover? Right. If you listened to our Christmas episode last year, You might remember us talking about a fabled five-hour John Hughes cut that was only seen by Chris Columbus that had never seen the light of day before. But in the past year, that has changed. John Hughes' family has painstakingly recovered and released an entire 70 minutes of deleted scenes from the archives of plane, trains, and automobiles, which is absolutely amazing and mind-blowing and crazy.

I never thought that would happen. You can hear in our last episode that we've consigned ourselves to the fact that that simply won't happen. And then like two months after we released that episode, boom, they're like, here you go. these deleted scenes you can find in the ultra hd blu-ray release of planes trains and automobiles it's included as an extra dvd titled lost luggage i highly encourage you to pick it up even if you're just like a little interested even if you just kind of chuckle at planes trains and automobiles just because i think it's like a crazy piece of cinema history um that there was like to me this is even crazier than the the fact that the justice league snyder cut actually exists like this is crazier than that because no one was asking for it right well and john hughes passed away years ago like he's he's gone yeah and like that's why last year we said we'd never see it because it's

been like 40 plus years it's crazy why would we see it i know like why would this suddenly come out it makes no sense but it's here i didn't know there was a john hughes cut and months later it came out i know like it's just because we talked about it this legend they heard our podcast They listened to us. Sadly, I think there are some other louder voices that were actually talking about the John Hughes cut as recently as us. I wish that Paul W.S. Anderson listened to our podcast so he would release the hell cut of Event Horizon. Isn't he dead? Paul W.S. Anderson? No. I thought he was dead. No, that's Wes Craven. I always get them confused. I don't know why. They're nothing alike. i know it's just because they have w and s in their names which is the dumbest reason to get someone to use it's so stupid it's like my brain is actually broken there's no reason to get a man with the name paul ws anderson confused with wes craven since this legendary lost footage has

actually been released to the world humongous thanks to the hughes estate for digging this up and then just like releasing it freely? That's nuts. Well, not freely. Like they must have put a lot of work into actually finding and digitizing all of these presumably like ancient 70 millimeter film rolls. That's what it has to have been, right? Well, it's possible that maybe these film reels had already been digitized to video at some point. By who? Well, that was a practice back in the 80s that was stupid. It was a terrible practice. Archivists hate it. Archivists hate this one trick. This one simple trick to get your lost footage released 40 years later. Archivists hate it. No, no. It's back in the 80s, people, VHS was just coming out. That's going to be really fun to animate when I animate this. That's going to be a really good site. Go ahead. So when VHS was coming out, people saw it as a superior format.

and people will often say oh put it in the superior format and destroy the old format right like no film reels take up a lot of space but yeah like 70 millimeter or whatever it was filmed on whatever film stock it was on i mean it's far superior yeah 70 millimeters film is like literally like perfect resolution it's analog resolution you can focus it as much as you want to focus it yeah i don't know if that's what happened here i just noticed that it's in a different aspect ratio um so maybe i don't know so i took it upon myself to re-edit and put together the hughes cut of planes transit automobiles and i spent hours and hours compiling the original hughes cut as close as we could possibly get which comes in at a whopping two hours 27 minutes a full hour longer than the original which was already pretty bulky for a comedy so i i'm pretty pretty happy i'm pretty proud of myself and pretty just thankful to the hughes

estate for for making this possible i put a lot of work into this episode i created and viewed the hughes cut i read at least two different versions of the original scripts for the movie which were changed before the hughes cut was made i read x scripts of the or well i mean i read as much as i could of the canadian mounted a trivia guide to planes trains and automobiles but i also tracked down and read the original actual canadian mounted erotic novel wow erotic erotica which also people didn't know existed for real until recently. Was it everything Del said it was? And more, yes. I watched multiple YouTube mini docs about the lost versions of this film. I listened to our original episode multiple times. I think I'm as ready as I can be. That's the best source. Well, I mean, yeah, it was, like, unabashedly so. So last time we talked about planes trains and automobiles there were a few things that we were unsure about we had the theory

that oh no wait wait you did one other really you went above and beyond to research this because you bought the planes trains and automobiles the game and we played it that's true no i did yes i bought planes trains and automobiles the game and forced you to play it with me the way that i forced you to do this was by cleverly disguising it as your birthday present so you would feel obliged to play with me because i love this movie so much so when we call it the game you might be confused it's not a video game it is a tabletop game it's a card game kind of except it comes with a shower curtain ring the rules are somewhat undefined and it was like a little confusing every turn has different rules based on the cards that you have i actually like the idea it's an interesting idea i can't say it was implemented well for this game i think that they could have put a little more thought into it and the worst part is the game like has nothing to do with planes trains and automobiles

like the cards would just say to do random things they didn't like gussy it up with a little like flavor text at all yeah a little like magic the gathering a little flavor text to be like this is what's happening like it could have at least had like a quote at the bottom of each card that was like those aren't pillows on every card those aren't pillows i mean i that would have honestly been enough for me i would have been better than nothing laughed myself silly about that that would have been hilarious last time we talked about this movie we had a theory that dell was actually a demon or he made a deal with the devil um essentially he was stalking uh u.s uh highways and tormenting kind of like lost uh people who were on their way home for for the holidays we didn't know why he was doing this uh we were unsure if he was after neil's soul or not uh and we also didn't really pinpoint why he was targeting neil in the first place

Well, he was after Kevin's mom's soul for sure. Maybe. I am now in a position to answer these questions. I can, having viewed the Hughes cut and read all these scripts and the Canadian Mounted, two versions of the Canadian Mounted, and having played the game, I can finally answer definitively, yes, Del was after Neil's soul. And I know why he was targeting Neil specifically. Del wanted to trade Neil's soul for the soul of his late wife so that he could be with her again. Del targeted Neil. Yeah, I know, right? This is like an Orpheus deal. I assume Orpheus is like some sort of Morpheus orgy. Machines. Basically, yeah. Sorry, it does nothing to do with this episode. So just thought you'd mention it. Reminiscing. um dell targeted neil specifically because the devil wanted the soul of a fornicator he wanted a cheating family man uh to to lock into hell sounds like there's another theory going on here then i hope he was cheating with kevin bacon i okay well that's actually the first

thing that i wanted to talk about after we released the original planes trains and automobiles episode, one of our fans reached out to us and gave us additional information that we weren't aware of. So we had some questions about Kevin Bacon's character, about what he was doing here, why Kevin Bacon would take a no dialogue cameo in a movie where all he does is like run and then get in the cab. There's a time to run. There's a time to get in the cab. There's a time to leap. One of our listeners, he goes by the handle AlanMurray5963 on YouTube. He let us know that Kevin Bacon is the same character that he plays in another film, another John Hughes film called She's Having a Baby, which they were filming at around the same time as this. Which Neil's wife is watching. She's watching She's Having a Baby later in the movie. And I'm wondering, what does this imply if if that movie exists in Planes, Trains and Automobiles and Neil sees a character from that movie?

And apparently and I haven't seen She's Having a Baby yet, but Neil Page, Steve Martin, also has a small cameo in She's Having a Baby. Oh, I think this implies that Neil's soul is already, you know, been targeted for deletion. I think that he is existing on the bounds of reality and unreality right now. He's wavering on the plane of inexistence. There are a lot of deleted scenes leading up to the first flight when Neil meets Del at the airport before they even get on the flight. There's a whole ton of additional footage where they're just chatting. If you remember in the original film, Neil, he lets Del know that, hey, you stole my cab earlier. And Del's like, oh, man, I feel terrible about that. I didn't even know. Let me make it up to you. I'll buy you a hot dog. How about a beer? In the extended cut, Del just keeps on going. And it actually is pretty funny. He just keeps on offering him things.

He's like, how about a beer? How about two beers? How about a pretzel? How about he offers him sourdough bread. He's like, how about a loaf of sourdough bread? He always carries one with him. Right. And I thought it was hilarious because he's like, you probably already have some. I always carry some with me. And I'm like, what? And this, I think, is actually where John Candy really does shine. How could he even come up with a line like that? Why would you ever think to ever infer that someone else already has a loaf of sourdough bread at the airport and that you already have some? he is very gross and disgusting at the airport he's like wolfing down a hot dog and flicks a piece of the hot dog across the entire room into a trash can which is a great shot wolfing down a hot dog he's smoking he's smoking as he wolves down the hot dog he is literally wolfing down mouthfuls of smoke it's really gross when he sits down with del there is a lot of additional footage

of him talking with Del. Del just goes on and on and on about all kinds of random topics. It really gets through to you just how much of a, as Del puts it, how much of an annoying blabbermouth he is. The Hughes cut certainly makes Del a lot less redeemable. I know. And less likely that Neil would invite him into his house at the end, which was already unlikely. I know. Like, he is just unstoppable in the Hughes cut. But he is just a disgusting, unstoppable man. So after they get diverted, the airplane goes down. Neil has a conversation with his wife on the phone in the extended cut. She specifically accuses him of shacking up with strangers. And she says it in a way that implies that this is not something that she didn't expect. It's not like, what the heck are you doing? Why aren't you home? It's more like, really? You're not home? You're out there shacking up with strangers, kind of like, again.

Del comes walking down the hall. You know, he wasn't even there during the conversation. He comes walking down the hall and immediately asks Neil. He's like, oh, a little trouble on the home front, eh? He couldn't have possibly heard the conversation. And even if he had heard Neil's side, it didn't really sound like they were fighting unless you heard Susan, Neil's wife. I think that maybe Del has a bit more information about their family situation and then he's letting on. Then Del warns Neil, I'm coming for you because of what you've done. He says, you know, the finest line a man can walk is between success at work and success at home. I got a motto, like your work, love your wife. Love your wife. I think it shows us a little bit about why Del targeted Neil. Well, his wife is, I mean, Neil's wife is very quick to jump to adultery later on in the movie. Right, exactly. And that's, well, in the Hughes cut specifically.

Yeah. And that's why I think this isn't her first rodeo, you know, like they've been here before. One thing that we discussed in the previous episode was the fact that Neil's wife seems kind of in the theatrical version. She seems kind of like downplayed, like she's really just not freaking out at all. She's kind of just nothing about this whole situation. Like she's she seems inconvenienced, but that's about it. I think it's interesting because in the Hughes cut and even more so in the earlier screenplays, she was a major part of the story. It kind of shows why she's so muted in her response because she had a response. They just removed it. But her mom or is it Neil's mom? It's both. I'll talk about this. So I read the screenplays. In one screenplay, it's Neil's mom named Peg. In the next screenplay, it's Susan's mom. named peg i know where did you hear that name yes uh their parents seem to kind of uh turn into each

other in as the screenplays progress well whoever's mom she is she's very defensive of neil and yeah quickly dismisses the charges of adultery that that's not happening so and that's why it was initially supposed to be neil's mom but then i think they realized why would she be having like a heart-to-heart with neil's mom in the middle of the night they're like it must be susan's mom well and of course neil's mom would defend neil yes yes as they leave the airport there is a massive deleted scene with uh doobie the taxi driver and doobie's taxiola the best content that the hugues cut i loved it i loved it is great i already liked doobie but man doobie's insane tell us all about it what happens he's a maniac so doobie he's nuts dude he's crazy he He is a murderous man. Like, you theorized that Doobie was a demon, like, you know, one of these traveling demons. And I was like, yeah, maybe, maybe.

Because Del knows him. Definitely. Definitely. Doobie is a demonic man. He purposefully takes Neil on the scenic route instead of the fast route, presumably to charge him more money because it ends up costing over $100 because the meter turned over once. But in the Hughes cut, we learned that it's probably so he could take him somewhere quiet to murder him. To kill him, yes. He says so. Like, you're not even inferring this. He said it. And Del has to, like, talk him down. It's really good. And Del really downplays it, too. Like, oh, okay, everyone just calm down. We're just going to apologize. Now, Neil, you apologize. For what? What did Neil say? He makes Neil apologize. Neil's just sitting in a taxi. yeah neil makes some just random comments that aren't even particularly offensive and doobie threatens to kill him he touched one of the uh porno cutouts that was falling off the ceiling and that was like oh that was an egregious my girls i think those might not be porno cutouts

but they might be girls that he's murdered that's what i was thinking too no i think these are the souls that he's captured he captures them and they turn into paper and he pastes them all over his his taxiola right so yeah doobie's taxiola is nuts but doobie's a pretty good character he apparently lost his virginity to a heifer right over there right over in that field um he takes them to his sister's house which is not his sister's house anymore anymore it's the house of some random guy that he doesn't know but has been stalking and then he offers to take them into that house and show them that guy's stuff which is great because he definitely doesn't know that guy like he the way he explains it is so good he's like yeah it's my sister's house at least used to be someone else lives there i can't figure him out but he's got like a two-headed snake you want to see it i'll take you in there i'll show it to you and i'm like doobie you can't

go in this house you don't know this guy oh and he gets offended when neil's like i have already seen a two-headed snake yeah for free for free yeah he offers to show it to them for five bucks it's like i'll take you into a stranger's house and show you his stuff for five dollars this is part of why i think he is a demon is the first time he hears neil's name He says, kneel, kneel, ah, kneel down. And then for the rest of the scene, he calls Neil, kneel down. Every time he says his name, he says, hey, kneel down. Hey, kneel down. What you doing back there, kneel down? You ever been called kneel down before? Neil's like, no. Because he's like a Christian mythological figure, a demon that wants to be like God. He demands subservience. his souls to kneel down to him which is why they're trying to steal Neil's soul exactly and Del, he gets upset because he's like hey this demon is just supposed to help me now he's trying to muscle in

on my con right like he's trying to get my soul so that's why he's like now calm down Doobie maybe he shouldn't have called another demon to give them a ride what else is he supposed to do? He's a demon he gets help from demons so when they get to the hotel i think that the man who works there is a demon as well not just any other demon but a demon named gus which is the name that dell takes he's not even very creative he just takes this other demon's name when he is a demon in home alone he calls himself gus absolutely these demons must just kind of swap names around they don't care dell uh gus like he just likes dell because it's you devil without the six without the vi some of the hotel delete scenes actually helped make it make a lot more sense yes they did so uh a lot of it is just dell messing around in the bathroom while neil is trying to shower which again is john candy at his best just being an annoying jerk

total weirdo um yeah and the theatrical cut they just separated those two things they weren't in the shower in the bathroom together yes but they were and this makes it make sense that all the towels are gone because in the theatrical cut it's like when did del use all the towels del orders a pizza and the pizza boy who comes to deliver it he is the thief who breaks into their room later and steals all their money and he does this because del's not very nice to him he under tips him and this pizza guy sucks and he had no right to get mad first of all del did tip him which he did not deserve because he dropped the pizza on the floor and just kind of piled the pieces back inside the box and also took a slice yeah i know and then for him to break in later because they didn't give him a good tip oh that guy's bad del is inciting people to do bad things he's like a shoulder demon right he is he's exactly later in the movie the other hotel they

stay at. They get the hotel manager to break the rules and give them a room for only $16 and a really nice watch. Then they make him pay for it, which is what the devil does. He gets you to break the rules and then you pay. He does the same with this pizza boy. He incites him to break the rules and then presumably sends Doobie after him. I wouldn't be surprised. Del doesn't have enough money to pay for the pizza. So he steals some of Neil's money or rather he just takes a Neil's wallet and pays for it with that. Del later in the movie many times tries to say, I may be a lot of things, but I'm not a thief. He's definitely a thief. He steals Neil's money and pays for pizza with it. And Neil already paid for the room. Yes. And the taxi and everything else. The deal was supposed to be that Del pays for dinner, which he didn't do. I know. And his justification for using neil's money which sounds kind of reasonable at the surface until you think about it he's like

well i couldn't pay for the pizza because it was 19 which 19 is a lot for one pizza even today that's kind of egregious but this actually is a weird phenomena that in the 80s and 90s pizzas were expensive and they got less expensive as time went on that's weird because i remember pizza like getting having a pizza night when we lived in like california in the 90s um was at least 20 bucks every single time yeah well to be fair neil thinks that 19 bucks is a lot for this pizza as well when dell tells him um but they did get a six pack of beer with it do pizza places deliver beer is that legal yeah well that was the weirdest thing to me i was like i don't think the pizza place is allowed to deliver beer unless you have a license carded yeah and have a liquor license that was the weirdest thing to me i was like you can't just like ask your pizza man to pick up a six-pack for you and bring it like but i mean they're way out

in the boonies maybe this place just doesn't care neil hasn't eaten in nine hours and dell orders an entire pizza and it's like i saved you a slice he ate the whole thing he saves neil one slice after paying with neil's money um and his reasoning for paying with neil's money is the pizza costs 19 and all i had were hundred dollar bills pizza boy couldn't break a hundred dollar bill which is true and at first you're like oh yeah that makes perfect sense until you realize later in the the next scene when they're at the restaurant he says i didn't steal your money neil i have 242 dollars in my wallet count it oh so he didn't only have hundreds oh no he had at least you had you had 20 he had a 20 or less than 20 like he could have easily paid for that pizza he's a thief and a liar and he tipped the boy not that well but with with neil's money anyway yes just keep the change it's not my change one important thing that we learn here

del goes through neil's stuff like not just his wallet but everything he opens all of neil's bags you had to make you get pretty mad about this which a murderer he should be and yes del's like i had to protect myself i don't even know you i needed to make sure you weren't some sort of creep or a murderer which uh yeah okay right um but he specifically mentions that neil has a stash of skin magazines multiple in his bag which neil is very embarrassed about and he tries to play them off as he's like those aren't skin for the articles articles is movie reviews and play reviews and critics and he's like yeah yeah that's not why anyone buys them just saying that maybe neil isn't the faithful man he tries to paint himself as well and del kind of like part of the reason why you could say he's redeemable is because he paints himself as like this idiot this bumpkin this this naive almost this person who doesn't think ahead you know and that's why

he has so many issues he just didn't think about it but clearly he thinks ahead if he thought to go through all of neil's stuff to make sure he's not like a murderer or whatever he says like absolutely he was thinking ahead and it's all just an act his his his well i don't even think he was going through it to make sure that neil wasn't a murderer i think he was just like looking for stuff to steal i don't know looking for sins that neil committed exactly and he found it like that's exactly what he found and what he points out to neil so as they're talking another evidence of what dell is up to uh regarding his devilish plans while they're eating neil says either way i'm home tonight come hell or high water and then dell perks up and he says well what do you prefer i'll take the high water meaning neil gets the hell oh man like i mean there's only one way there's only one way to interpret that right like yeah i'll take the

high water you get the hell they go and they catch the train re-watching this movie i think there's something that we missed the first time around oh this train should have easily gotten them all the way to chicago with time to spare why doesn't it um it breaks down it doesn't just break down the entire engine of this train is like plumes of smoke like big black billowing smoke just belching out of the front of this train as like the engineers are like leaping from the train and freaking out and like pointing at it and wondering what the heck is going on now i mentioned last time that i've been on a few trains that like stopped in the middle of the tracks and then we all had to get out and walk i've never been on one where the engine has been sabotaged so i think that you know with how much this train's engine is acting up i think that Del pulled a Dimitri. I think that Del realized that this train is the end of the line.

This train will get Neil all the way home and I have to stop it. And he took advantage of the fact that Neil decided to sit somewhere else. We don't know what Del's doing. I think Del sabotaged it. Maybe he even murdered the driver. I don't know. Or sent like little green demons to do it for him. Possibly. You know, he called on Rasputin. There's some deleted scenes on the bus. Essentially, it's just more singing. They sing the whole 99 bottles of beer on the wall. Luckily, they didn't include that entire song in the deleted scene. Just like the first couple and last couple verses. I know, I expected them to when it started up. I was like, oh boy, this is where the 70 minutes comes from. I was disappointed there weren't any extra shots of Devil Del when they go. Something I noticed when reading different versions of the script, as they went the wrong way down the highway and had to squeeze in between the two semis.

In the earliest version of this script that I read, they didn't even touch the semis as they went through. In none of the versions of the script that I read did it describe Del turning into a devil and them turning into skeletons. They never said that in the script. Well, they realized that the undercurrent of this devil story that they were telling, they realized that it wasn't enough. People wouldn't get it. They're like, we have to show him as a devil. We have to show him as a devil. That's right. They're like, there's no other way. We have to do it. So, you know, they had to tip their hand. Yeah. And also, you know, delete a ton of the evidence.

You know, they're like, we can't be too in your face about it. I mean, if you have the devil's implications, we'll just show him as a devil. Then people will. Well, once you have the devil's seat, you don't need the rest. You've already done it. You got it. They squeeze between the semis. They get to the next hotel. They manage to get a room by trading his fancy watch. Del is in the snow, all alone, and he starts talking to himself. Or is he having a conversation with a lost soul? So Del is communicating with his dead wife. So Del is clearly lamenting his deal with the devil. And he says, oh, I meet this guy. And what do I do? I smother the poor soul. Oh, soul. Oh, man. He says, I cause him more trouble than he has a right to. And he thinks about the deal he made with the devil. And he says, God, I have a big mouth. Because he mouthed off to the devil. He wished for the ability to see his wife again.

And he says, when am I ever going to wake up? Because his life is like a living nightmare now. He's a demon. He hates it. He just wants to wake up. He says, I wish you were here with me right now, but I guess that's not going to happen. Not now anyway, because he hasn't fulfilled his end of the bargain yet. Oh, yeah. He's like, I'm on my way. Very soon. He's like, I wish you were here now, but I'm going to get you. And then there's one more thing, and this was actually in the recovered footage that was removed from the film and re-added in the Hughes cut by me. he then finishes his conversation just to really underline that he's not talking to himself he says good night sweetheart and then he responds to her he's he stops for a second and smiles and says i love you too he heard her he's heard her talking to him he has the ability to converse with the lost soul of his wife yeah either he's crazy or or he's talking to a ghost maybe uh john hughes

thought that made him look a little too crazy so he edited that part out where he's like i love you too neil finally breaks down and says oh come in del come on and then it cuts to them kind of like partying in the room suddenly in the extended scenes del's just sitting there and he's just sweating and he's like oh it's hot in here and neil's like no it's not and he's like do you mind if i turn down the heat and he was like well okay but turn it back up after you know when you go to bed and i'm just like oh he's burning up and neil's not because he's already feeling the fires of hell because he's a demon oh and then hell freezes over in the next scene kind of yeah i mean neil almost freezes over right so because he turns the heater off and then goes the windows open well yeah and the windows open uh the entire room is like frigid and full of like ice and snow when Neil wakes up. And Neil, in the extended version, wakes up with no clothes on, of course,

because he slept in his underwear, and also with no blankets and no pillow. He's just on his bed as Del is sitting wrapped up in all of Neil's blankets, all of his own blankets, all of Neil's pillows, all of his own pillows, and all of his clothes. He's got his jackets on, his boots on in bed dell was actually trying to murder neil just then because no no he doesn't want to kill neil he wants his soul this isn't the hotel where they're sleeping in the same bed then it might make sense that just in his sleep he rolled over and stole all the covers dell two separate beds came out of bed and took all of neil's things and then went back to bed like that's the only way this makes sense and that's why they cut it because this makes dell just despicable he's a horrible person why'd you do that died in the middle of the night all he needed to do was close the window and turn on the heat turn on the heat which is what neil does as soon as he wakes up it's

not hard no no no i mean instead he was like i'll just take all of neil's blankets he won't mind around this part there's another deleted scene and this is probably one of the most important deleted scenes where neil's wife susan is talking to peg who depending on the script you're reading is either susan's mom or neil's mom one of their moms i think that maybe they're siblings oh no she's both of their moms i don't know but uh either way this reveals a lot about their marriage situation and perhaps why neil was the perfect candidate for dell as a lecherous fornicator Susan tells Peg that Neil has been traveling for two years. She says he can't call tonight because he's scared to tell me the truth. He doesn't love me anymore. I'm just going to put on my best front and give the kids as warm and loving of a holiday as I can. And then come Friday morning, we're gone. He paid for the house.

It's his. He can share it with his darling Del, whoever she is. Wow. Well, she's not wrong.

No, I mean, she's not wrong, except, you know, that Del is an evil demon who wants Neil's soul. And possibly Neil's house. Oh, yeah, probably.

I mean, he kind of gets it in the end. Yeah, I know. He gets invited in. Everyone knows once you invite a demon in, they get your house. I mean, it's pretty clear that he is cheating on her. She thinks it's with Del, but it's definitely with someone. A few more notes from the original script. she then reveals that john uh neil's co-worker from the beginning who's like you'll never make the six oh dad that guy's evil he got home last night even though he left after neil so again this makes neil look very bad um she says all i know is john got home last night and then neil is like what he he left after i did how could he get home and susan's like you tell me the airport's been open since this morning so of course if neil had just stayed at the airport he would have gotten home she says i have a pretty good idea of what you're trying to pull neil and all i can say is your timing stinks neil says yeah i'm yeah i know it's like during

thanksgiving i'll shack up with some girl uh neil says i'm pulling something i'm i'm trying to get home however i can and susan says how's del neil doesn't understand what she's getting at and he says how's del she says yes how's del he says why do you want to know about del he's fine he's a pain in the ass but why do you want to know about him and then susan says you just better make sure you don't come home with his panties in your briefcase oh man apparently neil vastly misinterprets and says funny you should mention that i dried off my face with them this morning because he dried off his face with del's underwear you gotta read the room susan doesn't understand and then slams the phone down and you know she hangs up on it so yeah the last note i have from the original script is uh there was actually an alternate ending which got filmed but still you know has never seen the light of day there's more the rest of the john hughes cut that we still don't have and

probably never will it's uh it's probably lost forever at the end of the movie uh you know in the in the theatrical cut uh neil gets on the train leaves dell at the station he's going home and then he realizes that dell is homeless or at least that dell you know doesn't have anywhere to go so he comes back and he finds del still at the station in the original script neil gets on the train and goes he gets off at the station you know where his house is and somehow del is there at the next station he wouldn't know where he lives oh man that's and this is where it gets really creepy like del is actually an unstoppable demon who just appears wherever neil is going oh man and he's a travel demon there's no justification given for that in the script it makes no sense and neil is baffled so he confronts del he's like what are you doing here get out of here stop following me and then you know del who has to come up with something

tells neil that he's homeless and he's like oh i just got nowhere to go and they go to a coffee shop together where del quote unquote admits everything to neil and this is where it's really good and he says every year since marie's been gone i've gotten closer and closer to losing it you know and making a deal with the devil to get her back he says usually i head for a church but this time he didn't he didn't make it he says uh this time i guess i didn't get to the church fast enough i just couldn't let go demons can't go right church well no but i mean usually when he's thinking about making a deal with the devil he goes to church he he has a talk with god you know smooth things out but this time he says i didn't get there fast enough i just couldn't let go that doesn't make sense unless he's saying like i couldn't let go of marie and i made a deal with the devil to get her back right like i don't know what else he could be saying then he warns neil

he says i vowed i'd never burden anybody with this and i broke my vow i held you away from your family i caused you a hell of a lot of trouble you better run oh man that's the line in the script you better run you showed up at his next stop well right i mean however you interpret it essentially he's admitting to stalking neil and that he has horrible plans for neil and that he was intentionally keeping him away from his family and he was intentionally keeping him from going home so i take this as 100 proof positive del is a demon he made a deal with the devil he's trying to steal neil's soul he's trying to keep him from going home and he did this because he misses his wife and he wants to get her back which he can do because you know the devil's gonna give him her soul right um i think that del would usually run to a church and make peace with god before turning to lucifer for help but this time he didn't make it he broke down he made a deal with the devil

Del was promised, you know, the soul of his wife in return for the soul of a fornicator. And that's why he warns Neil, you know, with his last breath, he says, you better run. So there you go. So did he decide not to steal Neil's soul? That's why he warned him? Because they had to become friends? I think he, you know, feels horrible about what he's about to do. So he's like, you better run. Because I'm about to. Well, after the credits roll, he steals his soul. There you go. Okay. All right. Well, I mean, either way, he does because Neil brings him home. He brings him to his house, to his family, where he can have all their souls. Oh, I don't know why you would bring this crazy stalker home like he you left him at a station and he showed up at the next one. He's clearly either he can teleport or he's got like money and finances to take a taxi and show up wherever you're going. And he knows where you're going.

Like something is wrong with this situation. Do not let this man come home with you. This is very, very weird. they should make a sequel called like homes tombs and stolen souls where he's in their home and he steals their soul dude if john candy was still alive i know you can get john goodman and whoa they're the same they both named john dude we gotta do that for our thanksgiving episode you can have what's left there's never anything left happy thanksgiving probably the only good family guy joke i've heard peter i'm holding hooters okay i have one more interesting note the state trooper who pulled them over so his name is officer cudner in the screenplay he rectally searched neil but not dell but even more importantly officer kudner is well known in his town for rectally searching people oh man they're sitting in the in a restaurant or in a cafe talking about it and dell says well neil you've hit rock bottom

doesn't get much lower than having a state trooper shine a flashlight up your can and uh he they both hurry out of the coffee shop the handful of patrons in the coffee shop turn and look at neil they've all overheard dell's remark neil smiles meekly uh then one of the patrons says so you met our sergeant kudner did you the patrons burst into laughter as neil shriek shrinks in his seat well how did they have they all been rectally searched yeah apparently everyone he's he's taken everyone in he's he's gotta check all the rectums i don't like this guy anyway i read x scripts of x scripts the canadian mounted there's a reddit user who posted two years ago that he had recovered and restored this book as reddit user those pretty peepers i'm assuming that he is the monster from jeepers creepers uh probably he says the book that he's reading was long believed to be a prop created for the film however it is not it is called the

Canadian Mounted by Mike Flowers. So I got a hold of those pretty peepers on Reddit and I asked him how he ended up coming across the Canadian Mounted. He said that he worked as a book designer and he recognized the layout of the Canadian Mounted from a series of sleaze novels that were put out by Beeline Books. So he set up an alert on various book websites like Abe Books. And after waiting two years, he finally got an alert that there was a copy of Canadian Mounted for sale. So he bought it. He then scanned it. He had to restore it and make it look all nice again. And since it has fallen out of copyright, it was published under a pseudonym and the company that published the book has been bankrupt for decades. Essentially, there's no way to establish any sort of copyright for this book. So he went ahead and uploaded what he had to a bookstore called Lulu. And now you can buy it there if you want. It's not even clear if this

book actually ever got an official release. There might have just been like some working copies that got passed around. And John Candy being from Canada, I guess, would be more likely to come across a copy of a an unpublished canadian uh smut novel i guess i don't know but anyway yeah john candy apparently brought it with him from home to use as a prop on set and i guess the rest is history thank you very much to those pretty peepers for your work making available that book that is everything i have for planes trains and automobiles though and i am just happy to say that I have finally seen the John Hughes cut, which we thought we would never see. Take that, Chris Columbus. Yeah, Chris, we don't need you. Get out of here. Even if you wanted to come on our podcast, I'd turn him down. I'd be like, no. We've already seen the John Hughes cut. We don't want to talk about Gremlins or Harry Potter.

Definitely not. What do you think of the John Hughes cut? Is it good? Like, is it worth watching? Is it better than the original? Is it worse?

If you like planes, trains, and automobiles, then yeah, get the extended version. Watch all the deleted scenes. Maybe do like Torvald did and edit them yourself together into your own John Hughes cut. Oh boy, it's so rewarding. Now that is a resounding endorsement if I ever heard one, so go on and do it, guys. As far as the theory goes, I believe originally this was my theory. This was your theory. I took it over. Sorry. I'm not going to disagree with it, but I do think that it's good evidence what we found out that specifically the alternate ending, so that there was stuff in the script that supports this theory quite a bit, and that the shot of him as a devil wasn't in the script. Those two things together, I think, prove it. No, I think that is like negative proof, but okay. Because they put the shot of the devil in, and then they didn't need the other stuff to get across this side story that they were clearly trying to tell.

They really made it on the nose with the devil shot, so they didn't need the alternate ending, and they cut it out. There you go. But that alternate ending pretty much proves it. How else would he know where to go? Yeah. How would he know where Neil lives and how can he have gotten there first? And why is he telling Neil to run? It's so good, dude. I wish they still had that alternate ending. It's very good. The music for this episode was provided by Christine. If you like our podcast, rate, review, subscribe, and support us on Patreon. And happy Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. Turkey time. Gobble, gobble. Gobble, gobble. And in case you've forgotten. Remember, the popcorn isn't real.

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